Marylamm

Sage Stealer

2008-12-04T00:07:00.000-08:00

So, this is sort of an old story but worth telling!!

Twas the night before thanksgiving and all through Safeway
Not a twig of sage could be found, not even a flake

So, here we were (me and Sarah) doing last minute late night shopping. Sarah needed sage so we went to the fresh herb section and none to be found!! We then went to the spice aisle, and you know how spices are categorized alphabetically?? well, every single brand had an EMPTY spot where Sage should go!! seriously! even the expensive ones. Deciding she could use another spice we moved on.

I was then in search of lemon juice (trying to cut corners and not squeeze fresh...) and of cousrse all the shelves were empty for that too. We had parted to find our NECESSARY ingredients. This is when the little evil there is in me.... came OUT!!! I was about to ask an employee if there might be any more lemon juice somewhere else, when I heard a woman ask...... "excuse me, do you have any more sage?? the spice aisle and fresh are all gone!!". I piped up "yeah, I was looking for sage too!" (really speaking for sarah who had walked away) The emp said yeah there's one more spot in the front of the store. I was FIRST to follow him up there and I spotted one lonely bottle on its' side of dried sage!!! I grabbed it just as the other lady walked up. My brain said, "she asked first she should get it if its' the last one" but somehow it didn't work!! I literally held it with two hands and said "OH, I only see one......." She said it's ok. I can use another spice.

I bolted to find Sarah and we rejoiced over our found sage. I then ran into other sage lady a couple more times and every time she said "it's ok. I can use another spice" I felt like jiminy cricket had grown about 5'3" and will now haunt me forever!!!

But oh were Sarah's scallopped potatoes the best with that sage.... mmm mmm!!!!!!!!!!!!

Angela is NOT my friend = )

2008-11-19T00:44:00.000-08:00

So, Robin and her mom (dear 'family' to me) recently put up a status on Facebook about yummy pumpkin bread they had enjoyed at Angela's house with cream cheese frosting!! Found out the bread was a mix from TJ's and had to get some....

I made it but since I don't own a 'bread' pan, I put them into cupcake pans! WONDERFUL!!! I put a little mayo since I only had 1 egg and it called for 2. So moist I barely got them to stand up!! Frosting was good too! sweet and creamy! Thanks to Angela, there were too many calories hanging around my house. haha

and, just for the record, Angela is my friend and 'family' too!!!! love u!

high school

2008-11-19T00:40:00.000-08:00

ok so most people know, I wasn't allowed to go to public high school because somehow it corrupted my brother... but still I think high school back then (10-15yrs ago) was not near as crazy as it is today.

I usually am the coordinator at an ELEMENTARY school. My oldest grade is 6th. Today, as a favor, I subbed at HAyward HIGH!!! OMGsh... never again will I complain about my kids acting crazy!

I refuse to write what I heard them talking about. They are so disrespectful and lethargic! I'm very concerned for our future. BTW HayHigh is the GOOD high school in HUSD!! I was actually sick to my stomach when I heard their conversation and my niece goes to that school....

Can't wait to go back to my real world tomorrow!!!!!! = )

merry christmas to me. EARLY!!

2008-11-11T22:48:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend, I decided it was so important to answer a txt, even though my fingers were a little wet. Well.... then the #2 and the up arrow and the volume button stopped working. ugh!! I was frustrated. They magically started working again by Sunday and I was relieved.

short lived!!

Monday, it was back to non working buttons. I needed to make a phone call and couldn't dial a 2?? Then I was txting (or trying to) and you don't realize how much you use the letters abc in a txt til you can't use them at all. haha

After work on Monday, I went to the Sprint store to try and get a repair. While waiting for my name to be called, I spotted him from across the room. It was love at first sight!!....

Mr. Blackberry was luring me! They had the red one. (Sprint didn't have the red one before) This is the one I've been eyeing at Verizon and said in Dec (when my contract ended) I would get a new phone and switch to Verizon.

Long story short, when my name got called, I ended up with a blackberry (red). It's so nice!! Welcome to the real world. Still learning how to use it... if you know me.. this will take a while haha!!! So after rebates and credits, I got a pretty good deal!! merry christmas to me...

A few good men?

2008-11-11T21:27:00.000-08:00

No!!! I'd be happy with just ONE!!! thank you very much! So... there's this guy who has liked me for a while and I decided to go on a date with him. Casual... I was so BORED!! (if he's reading this.. sorry) It's just not there for me. He can't keep it JUST friends. Why can't guys get the message...

Here's my shout out! To all my readers, please!! if you know of a good guy (meaning has a job and loves God) and is over the age of 27!! please let me know...

Obviously, all my facebook friends are eager for me to hook up too!! I took of my 'single' status and it was total mayhem on there! It didn't say dating PEOPLE!!!! = )

men......... ya I want JUST ONE!!!

my new son

2008-11-11T21:23:00.000-08:00

I usually am not a real cat lover but... 4 kittens were abandoned at the elementary school where I work. I ended up with one of them. His name is Jack. Jack Sparrow! Let me tell you, he is some pirate!!

I feel like I pay the rent so he has a place to claim. haha He's a lot of fun! He sleeps on my hair. Wakes me up every 2 or 3 hours to play. And has claimed 'his spot' in front of my computer monitor!!

I feel officially old and single getting a cat but he's good company. Better then some guys I know. haha next blog to follow....

I will upload pictures of Jack as soon as I find my charger to my camera.. (that's a problem!!)

Sorry so silent

2008-11-11T21:20:00.000-08:00

Oh blog, oh blog... how I've ignored you and my bored readers...

It's been soo long but I firmly believe in not using blog sites as therapeutic outlets. Lately, I've had news worth sharing!!!

Update... my promotion is official and I signed my new contract. On probation for 6 months again!!!! It's so worth it though. I still love my job.

Currentlym I am still churchless and trying to find the right place to be. Prayers are always welcome!!

So, that's my life in a nutshell. Don't get too excited! = )

Promotion

2008-08-25T22:17:00.001-07:00

I know life is busy and I haven't been able to get in contact with everyone but I have a praise report I want to share.

In June, I got "administratively" transferred from my school where I had been for 2 years to another school and in a very 3yr old fashion, I threw a royal fit!! It was a lateral transfer and I have been trying to get a promotion for the last 9 months!!! Finally, one of the supervisors talked me into going and realizing that it wasn't forever....

Well, last Thursday I was having a conversation with a very close friend and we were talking about me being promoted and I told her, I don't expect for at least 6 more months. That afternoon I had to go to the School District ( I work for Hayward Unified...) for a meeting and after they whispered for me to stick around. I did and they offered me a promotion. It is a great raise, better hours, benefits and an answer to all my hard work!! God always knows the perfect timing for when we get what we need and want!!

I am the coordinator of my own after school program. It's going to be great!! The first person I talked to was Jesus... He's the keeper of my soul. He is so faithful and it's overwhelming how much He loves me!! That's a whole other blog, just about how much he loves me... but it's late.

Spread the good news!!! Can't wait to shop for Christmas!!$$!!$$!!

go figure

2008-08-25T22:17:00.000-07:00

So for the longest time my friends were telling me I needed to blog about all the crazy things that happen to me. Wouldn't you know it.... Now I have a blog and my life has totally calmed down. I should've did this a year ago... haha j/k

To follow up on the death certificate for those of you who were wondering where my obituary was, Alameda County made a mistake. Go figure... I am alive and well.

death certificate?!?!?!?!

2008-08-06T23:43:00.000-07:00

Now I know why my friends have been encouraging me to blog for so long. I seriously think my middle name is 'murphy'. Cause if it can happen it will happen to me.

I have had 'hours' of care through Alameda County for people to take care of me since I can remember. At the end of May, I let me employee go and June 1st my mom started working for me. We didn't turn in the paperwork til July 2nd. Late in true KERR fashion!!! I got it back in the mail stating my case was on 'leave'. I had no idea what that meant. In TRUE KERR fashion both my social worker and her supervisor are on 2 week vacations.

The stalker that I am, I called today and if I got a voicemail I left a message. I didn't care who, what, when, where. They got my name, ssn, and ph #. I got a call back and this very nice lady who was brave enough to return my call put me on hold for about 20 minutes. She comes back on the phone and says, we have a DEATH CERTIFICATE on file for you. It's sorta hard to read but the DOB seems right it's you. I said what should I do. She told me I need to come in and show them something. I said like what... Do they wanna pinch my cheeks and see my smile? How do you prove you're still alive!!!???? She said I don't know.............

Tomorrow should be interesting. To be continued.....

grandma?really?

2008-08-04T20:38:00.000-07:00

Oh the joys of working with kids. Today, we added about 15 new kids to our after school program from all grades K-6. It was about time to go and one of the 3rd grade girls told me I look really little.!! hmm I said oh really. She said, ya your legs look little like a grandma's. Do you have grandkids?? I about died. I don't even have gray hair!!!!!!!!! I said no and laughed. She said, well, how am I supposed to know how old you are. You're not my mom!!! LOL

survey says....

2008-07-30T22:42:00.001-07:00

What kind of parent are you or will you be???

Today, one of my "angels" decided to shove another girl into the boys' bathroom. The other girl was trying to fight her off but the shover had at least 6" on her. Not quite a fair battle. I went for them and told her she was in trouble.

I wrote her up a 'white slip' and this requires a parents signature. When her mom got there I asked for her signature and explained what happened. She proceeded to tell me her daughter told her another girl pulled her hair and didn't in trouble yesterday. My boss piped up and said 'actually your daughter started that yesterday, I saw'. The mom still went on and on and on about how they are just little kids and we need to be more understanding. She supposedly didn't mind that her daughter got in trouble but we shouldn't be "PICKING" on her daughter!!!

UNBELIEVABLE!!! parents blow me away. Grant it, I'm not a parent biologically yet, but I have a universal request. There should be a session during LAMOZ (spelling??) that goes something like this...... "ladies you are about to give birth to a human being, and contrary to what you know and believe, your human you're birthing will NOT BE PERFECT!!!!" and if it's not asking too much, I'd like to teach the class PERSONALLY!!!

chop chop

2008-07-30T22:42:00.000-07:00

Most of you know, I work with elementary children. This school year (I work year round, so school is already in session for us) I am working with Kindergarteners for the first time. They are so fun and care free but still need to be reigned in a little....

These kids are learning their letters and shapes, numbers and colors.. It's fun!!!

So, today during homework hour, some of the kids needed scissors and glue for one of their homework pages. I passed out the appropriate supplies and moved on to other kids that needed help on a different page. A few minutes passed by (maybe 2 or 3) that I was helping one boy and then turned around to check the other side of the room and I see this HUGE pile of CHOPPED hair on the floor, under a desk. I immediately freaked and took the scissors. This girl has hair to her waist!! You know how when you want to comb your hair, you reach back and divide your hair in half? Well, that's how the "trim" started. She pulled HALF her hair around that went to her waist and CHOPPED it to her chin line!!!!!!!!!!!

I called my boss to come and we both freaked out!! Called her mom and her mom was cool. (THANK GOD!!) So now she has a cute bob.

OH the joys of working with kids.....

Surgery

2008-07-23T23:16:00.000-07:00

So as some of you know. I allowed many doctors play star wars in my left kidney and they blasted 10 calcium stones. SUCCESSFULLY!! Score!! I am very happy with the results and every day i'm a little closer to better... Vicadin (spelling??) is awful. Don't like the stuff at all. But Motrin rocks!! = )

In true Mary style, if it could go wrong it did. I won't bore you with the "oh really?" stories but there is DEFINITELY a funny story that is worth sharing.

Since God is taking his sweet time perfecting my husband.... ; ) I am still free to enjoy his creations!! On the morning of my surgery (btw not allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight the previous night) I had to be at UCSF at 8:30 in the morning and my surgery was at 1:30. yeah... So, Bekka, my awesome niece came with me and after my pre-op was done we had about 3 hours to kill. She was hungry and thirsty. (like I wasn't = )) I took her up to the cafeteria and she wanted juice. We hung out for a while and then I decided it was time for the torture to end. We went to the elevator and lo and behold... there was a (sounds of beautiful music now...) beautiful, hot young asain guy wearing scrubs that had cut off sleeves to reveal very curvy, dark (and tattooed) arms. I looked at Bekka and whispered, or so I thought, "he's hot".(I think he heard me cuz he looked at me and smiled.) She replied, "ew"!! We laughed and that was that.

3 hours later I get called into surgery and was given the latest version of the beloved backless hospital gown. Being that I've been through this before, I knew I would have to have a "lift team" assisting with the transfer from my chair to bed, I left on my tank top and chones!! ya... I came out feeling very violated but ready. I put my chair by the bed to make the transfer work and waited for the "lift team" to show up.............. GUESS WHO was on the lift team. Yours truly!! Hot, tattooed, buffed asain guy!! We both looked at each other and - paused - he quickly exited and mumbled something about needing to get gloves. He came back and..... He was very strong = )))) I safely made it and was VERY glad I chose to keep my tank top on and my chones...................

Oh God I need my HUSBAND!!!

I'm doing better each day and I thoroughly want to thank you for your prayers. I know it has been God that has brought me through!!

FINALLY!!!!!!!

2008-07-09T23:36:00.000-07:00

I know I know. It's taken me years to get to blogging. You will all be hearing my funny stories soon. = )